We all need safety and belonging

As human beings, we are all hard-wired for connection. We need to know we belong. That we are loved exactly as we are. That someone understands and celebrates us. We need these things as much as we need food and water – perhaps more so.

We all need a safe haven

This closeness and safety provides us a safe haven. We have a place to go to receive care and comfort. We can safely express our own emotions and needs. Receiving this kind of care and support gives us the emotional bandwidth to be more empathic and understanding – toward our partner as well as toward others.

We all need a secure base

Feeling close and safe with our partner also gives us a secure base. Knowing someone loves us, accepts us, and has our back allows us to be fully ourselves. We feel more confident. More able to take risks. More adaptable in new situations. 

Providing safety and belonging to members of LGBTQ+ community

We all need this sense of safety and belonging. We need it in our intimate relationships, and we need it in our communities. Members of the LGBTQ+ community have generally not been given this sense of safety and belonging in our communities. They have not been made to feel supported and celebrated, safe and secure.

During Pride month, we are invited to think about this. To learn more about the history and everyday experiences of members of the LGBTQ+ community. To consider taking a step beyond posting a rainbow flag on our facebook page and extend a sense of safety and belonging to these members of our community. 

Safety and belonging in your relationship

First, think about safety and belonging in your own relationship. Do you and your partner have that safe haven where you both feel understood and supported? Do you have that secure base where you feel confident out in the world? Can you talk about this together? 

Extending safety and belonging to others

Next, are there ways you may want to challenge yourself to extend this sense of safety and belonging to others, including people in the LGBTQ+ community? Check out this list of ideas! 

Just think about the kind of community we could build if everyone felt a sense of safety and belonging!